Behold the fiscal prophet hath spoken

With the powers of prophecy the Lord has granted me, I can predict a full 24 hours before the treasurer publishes the federal budget that it will contain:

  • Handouts for breeders in McMansions
  • Handouts for old geezers
  • Pork barrelling for marginal seats
  • More money allocated to advertising than alternative energy research
  • Meretricious and ineffectual spending on health, education, climate change, infrastructure or anything else useful
  • Piddling tax cuts that are an outrage given the enormity of the surplus of our money the government has taken from us and then refused to tell us why we shouldn’t get it back, which are at the same time criminally negligent tax cuts, given we know Australians will spend the extra money on plasma TVs and poker machines instead of saving it, thus driving up inflation and interest rates
  • Absolutely fuck all for me.

The Lord has blessed me with the uncanny ability to determine that when you see something happening again and again and again, you call it a pattern.

3 Comments Add yours

  1. thepigs says:

    capping salaries using AWAs yet giving wage increases through tax cuts. everyone wins. i’m all for wage increases so my house increases in value…

  2. Josh says:

    You have kids and house, AND you live in a marginal seat. I’m surprised Peter Costello isn’t coming round to your house personally to give you free blowjobs and suitcases full of cash.

  3. thepigs says:

    did i mention i’m a swinging voter?

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